My Journey to a Book Contract - Part 7 Internal Dialogue Editor's Notes

by Elva Cobb Martin

Today I am sharing some internal dialogue notes from an editor of my romantic suspense novel, Summer of Deception, which was released in May, 2017.

What do you think the characters in the pictures below might be thinking?

Secret:  Ethan Becket, my hero for my next novel. He's begging me to tell his story.

Internal Dialogue and Italics – Notes from Susan Baganz, Editor, 

   Internal dialog is the way someone talks to themselves in their minds, it’s not just mere thoughts)

1) Just plain thoughts are not italicized.  

     

     Was this a manipulation?  

     Good gravy. Was this the way the Marines landed?  

    

2)When the character is actually talking to himself, that should be italicized. 

   

      It was just a nightmare. It was just a nightmare.

      Get out of my way, please.

      Not expecting her?

      A pleasing fragrance emanated from her. Musk or lavender?

3) Silent prayers are italicized.

     God help me.

     Lord, thank You for this wonderful summer position, but I’m going to need Your help big time to sit at table with this man every day.

4)  Third person past tense versus first person present tense in thoughts. (This was an eye opener for me)

         

     Incorrect: Wipe the silly smirk off your face. (Simple thought of character I had in italics)

    Corrected: She longed to wipe the silly smirk off his face.

    

     Incorrect: Yes, what is preventing me?

     Corrected: Yes, what was preventing her?

      Incorrect: So you don't care a thing about Morgan, Mr. Barrett? And you think marijuana shouldn't be legalized, but you've stashed a fortune in cocaine in your attic.

     Corrected:  So he didn't care a thing about Morgan. And he thought marijuana shouldn't be legalized but he stashed a fortune of cocaine in his attic. 

                                                       ***

Thanks for stopping by. Please share any tips you have about internal dialog, and do share this blog on your social media if it proved helpful.

Be blessed today,
Elva

Elva Cobb Martin is vice-president of the South Carolina Chapter of American Christian Fiction Writers. She is a former school teacher and a graduate of Anderson University and Erskine College. She has two inspirational novels contracted with Lighthouse Publishers of the Carolinas. Summer of Deception, a contemporary romantic suspense, and an historical romance, In a Pirate’s Debt. Both have spent time on Amazon’s 100 Best Sellers List for Women’s Religious Fiction. Decision, Charisma, and Home Life have carried Elva's articles. Jim Hart of Hartline Literary represents her. She and her husband Dwayne are semi-retired ministers. A mother and grandmother, Elva lives in Anderson, South Carolina. Connect with her on her web site http://www.elvamartin.com,on  her blog
http://www.carolinaromancewithelvamartin.blogspot.com
Twitter www.twitter.com/ElvaCobbMartin; Facebook http://www.facebook.com/elvacobbmartin;  and Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/elvacobbmartin

Link to her romance novels and non-fiction works on Amazon: http://amzn.to/2pOgVHI

My Journey to a Book Contract - Part 5 Show Don't Tell

by Elva Cobb Martin

Show/don't tell is a biggie for us writers to master, and I keep working at it, believe me. Randy Ingermanson has helped me a lot. Here is an excerpt from his blog archive at https://www.advancedfictionwriting.com

How to Show/Not tell 

by Randy Ingermanson

 1) Action: Anything your characters do, shown in real time. 

• Jake swung the bat into the kidnapper's head.

 2) Dialogue: Anything your characters say, shown in quote marks.

      "Take that, you scurvy dog!" Jake shouted.

3) Interior Monologue: Anything your chracters think, whether a verbatim record of the thought or a mere statement of it. Verbatim thoughts are often shown in italics, whereas indirect thoughts never are.

    And if you ever touch my daughter again, you're dead.

    What were these idiots thinking, to mess with the daughter of a Navy Seal?

4) Interior Emotion: Anything your characters feel. This is best done by showing direct physiological reactions which can be interpreted as emotions.

      Another rush of adrenaline boiled up in Jake's stomach.

5) Description: Anything your characters can see, hear, smell, taste, or touch.

     Two gunshots range in quick succession. The bare light bulb in the basement exploded in a burst of darkness. Cold air rushed over Jake like a river. He smelled gunpowder so strong he could taste it. The small red dot of a laser aiming device raced across the floor toward his feet.

What has helped you show/not tell? Please leave a comment and share this blog on your social media by clicking on the icons below.

Be blessed today,
Elva

Elva Cobb Martin is vice-president of the South Carolina Chapter of American Christian Fiction Writers. She is a former school teacher and a graduate of Anderson University and Erskine College. She has two inspirational novels contracted with Lighthouse Publishers of the Carolinas. Summer of Deception, a contemporary romantic suspense, and an historical romance, In a Pirate’s Debt. Both have spent time on Amazon’s 100 Best Sellers List for Women’s Religious Fiction. Decision, Charisma, and Home Life have carried Elva's articles. Jim Hart of Hartline Literary represents her. She and her husband Dwayne are semi-retired ministers. A mother and grandmother, Elva lives in Anderson, South Carolina. Connect with her on her web site http://www.elvamartin.com,on  her blog
http://www.carolinaromancewithelvamartin.blogspot.com
Twitter www.twitter.com/ElvaCobbMartin; Facebook http://www.facebook.com/elvacobbmartin;  and Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/elvacobbmartin

Link to her romance novels and non-fiction works on Amazon: http://amzn.to/2pOgVHI

My Journey to a Book Contract - Five Vital Steps (Part 3 Theme)

By Elva Cobb Martin

Today I continue my series on "My Long Journey to a Book Contract - Five Vital Steps."
You can get the full blogs in my archives on Part 1 and 2 but here is a fast review:


Here are the five steps I listed in Part 1:

1) NEVER give up!
2) Keep Honing Your Craft
3) Importance of Conferences and Writing Groups
4) Help Other Writers 
5) Learn how to Submit to Editors and Agents

In Part 2 I covered four ways I've learned to plot a novel. 

Today, in Part 3, I continue with "Honing Your Craft" and important things I learned that helped me on the way to a contract. 

Plug into a Theme - A story’s most basic element

The author’s worldview, their core values and outlook on life, drive the theme. Here are 10 central themes in film and books constantly repeated which describe an opinion about society, human nature, God, or life in general.

1) Good vs. Evil   - Star Wars, The Chronicles of Narnia,

         The War Room

2) Love Conquers All 
 - The Notebook, Love Comes Softly                      series, The Passion

3) Triumph over Adversity – The Blind Side, Facing the Giants

4) Individual vs. Society – Schindler’s List, The Elephant Man

5) The Battle – Braveheart, The Patriot, Attila

6) Death as a Part of Life – The Shack, Driving Miss Daisy

7) Revenge – Cape Fear, Revenge of the Nerds

8) Loss of Innocence – Sixteen Candles, Toy Story 3

9) Man vs. Himself – Gone with the Wind,The Godfather

10) Man vs. Nature –Jaws, Armageddon, Jack London stories,               Survivor shows

A quick check of stories in the Bible will reveal many universal themes. In fact, the Bible hasn’t left out any nitty-gritty issues mankind faces.

■ Husband and wife join in wrongdoing (Adam/Eve, Ahab/Jezebel, Ananias/Sapphira)

■ Jealousy/sibling conflict (Cain/Able, Rachel/Leah,                       Joseph/brothers)

■ Love/hate triangles (Abraham/Sarah/Hagar;                                     Jacob/Leah/Rachel)

■ Arranged marriages (Isaac/Rebecca, Jacob/Leah/Rachel,               Christ and His Bride

■ Rape (Dinah and Shechem; Tamar and Ammon)

■ War and its mighty men (Joshua, David, Gideon, Samson)

■ Women’s rights (the daughters of Zelophehad Joshua 17:3-6)

■Adoption vs. Infanticide (Moses)     

■Adultery/Murder (David/Bathsheba) (Hosea)

■ The perfect love story – Ruth and Boaz

■ The Wrong Kind of Sex  – Sodom & Gomorrah, the Levite’s concubine (Judges 19), Samson & Delilah

■ Redemption and Forgiveness – (the Prodigal Son and                        numerous stories)

Because I'm an inspirational writer, I want my novels to reflect my Christian worldview, core values and outlook on life, through whatever theme I choose. That's the legacy I want to leave with my readers and future generations.

Can you discern the writer's worldview in the movies and/or books you have read recently? So much being written and filmed today is in a secular worldview, but I do love to read and view stories with a strong Christian worldview. How about you?

What is your theme in your current WIP? Can you add to our theme list? Please leave a comment and share this blog on your social media if it helped you.

Be blessed today!
Elva Martin

Elva Cobb Martin is vice-president of the South Carolina Chapter of American Christian Fiction Writers. She is a former school teacher and a graduate of Anderson University and Erskine College. She has two inspirational novels contracted with Lighthouse Publishers of the Carolinas. Summer of Deception, a contemporary romantic suspense, and an historical romance, In a Pirate’s Debt. Both have spent time on Amazon’s 100 Best Sellers List for Women’s Religious Fiction. Decision, Charisma, and Home Life have carried Elva's articles. Jim Hart of Hartline Literary represents her. She and her husband Dwayne are semi-retired ministers. A mother and grandmother, Elva lives in Anderson, South Carolina. Connect with her on her web site http://www.elvamartin.com,
her blog http://www.carolinaromancewithelvamartin.blogspot.com 
Twitter www.twitter.com/ElvaCobbMartin; Facebook http://www.facebook.com/elvacobbmartin;  and Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/elvacobbmartin

Link to her romance novels and non-fiction works on Amazon: http://amzn.to/2pOgVHI